I just got this from a friend at the Minnesota Family Council. This is one man’s “take” on whether it even matters whether we’re “born that way.”
Several years ago a married man in our small church left his wife and two sons to join the gay “lifestyle.” Later at a men’s retreat we grappled with why a man would abandon his family for another man. Some argued he was born that way. Others claimed he made a personal choice. However to some, the distinction seemed irrelevant.
The men in our group knew each other well and spoke candidly. However, when someone asked if anyone had looked at another woman with lust the room was silent. After a brief pause all the men confessed to the affirmative. He then asked if they had lusted over a woman in our church and, reluctantly, all pleaded guilty. Rhetorically, he suspected we had looked at one another’s wives as well. But before anyone could answer he said, “Well then it seems like we were all born that way? I guess we should be able to sleep with anyone we want?”
In other words, even if we knew beyond any shadow of a doubt what causes same sex attraction, that by itself doesn’t tell us what kind of sexual norms a society should have. You have to already believe that sexual activity is an entitlement, and that being in a sexual relationship is essential to living a meaningful life, and a bunch of other things, to connect the dots between “I was born this way,” to redefining marriage.